FartMail.me

Privacy Policy

Your data is very important, to the future expansion of FartMail.me

By existing you agree to the following

  1. All information about you is property of FartMail.me, including but not limited to
    1. Height
    2. weight
    3. SSN
    4. Yearly income
    5. Voting choices
    6. Shoe size
    7. Number of fingers
    8. Fingernail length
    9. Number of eyelashes
    10. Web browsing history
    11. Website preferences
    12. Etc
  2. FartMail.me has the right to do anything with your former information, including but not limited to
    1. Sell
    2. Change
    3. Correct
    4. Remove
    5. Rebrand
    6. Transfer
    7. Rent out
    8. Consume
    9. Study
    10. Publish
    11. Etc
  3. To opt out* of this policy, you must
    1. Invent a time machine**
    2. Travel back to before your birth
    3. Prevent your own birth***

FartMail.me reserve its god given right, to update this policy at any time, for any reason, without notice.

* Once FartMail.me obtains the ability to traverse time, you will no longer be able to opt out.

** You must invent a time machine before FartMail.me to successfully opt out.

*** In the unlikely event that you do not disappear upon preventing your birth, you are required to kill yourself, and have your body, and any identifying documents, burned. Simply stating that you have done this, will not suffice.